EP. 31 | The Biggest Lie About Emotions: What Happiness Costs Us
In this episode, I dive into what I believe is the biggest lie we've been sold about emotions. I challenge the glossy magazine version of emotional wellness that tells us strong, successful people have mastered positive thinking and banished all those "negative" emotions.
What I Explore:
Beyond the Happiness Trap: I share why our cultural obsession with being happy all the time is actually making us miserable. Research from 2017 confirms what I've learned the hard way: valuing happiness too highly leads to greater disappointment and unhappiness.
A Fundamental Shift: I invite you to stop labeling emotions as "positive" or "negative" (which turns them into a moral issue) and instead ask: Is this emotion helpful or unhelpful right now? Is it driving me toward meaningful action?
The Power in Discomfort:
After my sister died in a preventable accident overseas, my anger wasn't "negative" – it became the fuel for creating change that might save other families from our pain
I discuss how courage exists precisely because we feel fear first
I share how grief research (including Brené Brown's work) shows our capacity to feel grief deeply directly correlates with our capacity for joy
The 50/50 Principle: I explain what my coach Brooke Castillo taught me about accepting that life will be roughly 50% wonderful and 50% difficult – and how embracing this ratio stops us from "suffering about our suffering."
Fulfillment vs. Happiness: I reveal what Harvard's longest-running study on adult development discovered: successful people aren't those who experience less pain, but those who've developed the capacity to feel all human emotions without self-judgment.
Like what you hear but struggling to put it into practice? Schedule your FREE consult call with me here to learn how my personalised coaching can help you do exactly that.
Get your copy of my book “Okay, Now What?” here!
It's also available as an audiobook - narrated by yours truly! So if you prefer listening to audiobooks narrated by the author themselves, make sure you check it out on Audible or your favorite audiobook outlet!
Listen to the book on Audible.
Want to download a free chapter of my book to give it a read first? CLICK HERE.
Interested in hiring Kate to speak? LEARN MORE →
DON’T FORGET:
ENJOY THE SHOW?
Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via:
